|| 6 || Health. Always Taken For Granted.

I was supposed to post this post last week { again. running a week behind on this gratitude challenge thing } but life seemed to just get in the way of sitting down and blogging. typical.

 

When I first decided to jump ahead on this gratitude challenge and discuss why I was thankful for health I was going to focus on myself and how I was thankful I made it through all my health challenges last year - with scars { literally } but I made it through. I thought it would be a good idea to talk about it since may is melanoma awareness month and I wanted to urge everyone to take the time this month to go to the dermatologist to get checked.   ....seriously, though - go get your body looked at... I was ready to explain and talk about how years of baking in the sun and tanning beds probably led to it.  And I will still say that no tanning bed is good and you may think that a good burn will turn into a good tan, but there is no such thing as a "good burn" and to wear sunscreen. But right now I just don't feel led to talk about how I am thankful for my health.

 

but I just read the news that my sweet friend from high school is having one last test done on her 3 week old before they put her on the heart transplant list. her 3 week old is suffering from heart failure. it just puts everything into perspective for me. I am healthy. my husband is healthy. I have a healthy, happy, beautiful daughter. who may have been cranky this weekend since she was cutting 3 teeth, but she was not in the ICU fighting for her life surrounded by my family. 

 

I feel like we take for granted our health and we just assume that our kids are immune to bad things and then WHAM they just hit us or someone close to us it hit with something hard.  My heart hurts for my friend and her family and her sweet baby girl.  It makes me want to hug McKenna just a little tighter each night and get less frustrated with her when she feed her cheerios and strawberries to the dogs.

 

I have a happy and healthy family and baby girl and grandparents for her to grow up with and brother and extended family. For that. I am so very very thankful.  And yes, I am thankful that my husband urged me to go to the dermatologist, if it was not for him my melanoma would still be on my back doing who knows what. I am thankful that it was caught early; after all, early detection really does save lives.

 

So if you have like .349885 seconds to spare. Just send a good prayer up or good thoughts or whatever you do in tough times for my friend and her family.  And hug your family a little tighter and tell them how much they mean to you. Because you could be hit with your wham moment at any time.

5 for Friday {thankful edition}

Every year I have so much to be thankful for, but this year I feel like I have A LOT to be thankful for. Obviously, I am thankful for every member of my family and my friends and my job and that I have a warm house to come home to every day. but these 5 things I am especially thankful for this year! =D

{one}
THIS LITTLE THING! McKenna has brought unimaginable joy to my life.  And while it has not always been easy and I picked up MRSA bringing her into this world and I have cried many frustrated tears, it has been worth it. I just love waking up to her baby babble on the weekends and her happy baby smiles make me realize I have to be doing something right.  She has given me so many fun times, good laughs, and fun memories in the short 4 months. She has given me a whole new perspective on life and for once a solid work life balance.  I look forward to going to work, but I love coming home to her and my little family.  And even though I feel like she is growing up too fast already, I really cannot wait to watch her grow up.  it is crazy to me that this time last year, she was our little secret and now we get to share her with our family and friends. 

{two}
Kyle J. I really could not have a better husband and McKenna is one lucky lady to have him as her Dad. And even though I am insanely jealous that he is the only one that can make her laugh so far, the Daddy & McKenna moments are something that bring me a joy that I cannot even begin to put into words. Kyle has been my #1 supporter and fan through all the struggles and tears of trying to figure out this parenting thing. And when it would have been understandable for him to think I was losing my mind and going crazy as I cried for days over little things, he never once made me feel like my feelings or emotions were irrational. I love that he constantly remembers that even though we are both busy and tired we still need to put our relationship first and spend quality time together.  McKenna and I are both so very lucky to have Kyle in our lives.

{three}
My parents & McKenna’s Grandparents. They have been so helpful this year which the HUGE life change Kyle and I went through.  From helping take care of the dogs while I was in the hospital for 6 days, to making dinner every night and washing bottles and clothes when they were staying with us while we were trying to get this parenting thing under control.  And then they dropped everything to come back to help take care of little M when we found out that my c-section was infected with MRSA. And now with them so close, we can call in a favor when needed to help take care of the little one when we have to work.  And, you can obviously tell that they love our little girl so much.  McKenna is going to be SO lucky to grow up knowing her Grandma & Granddad and seeing them often.

{four}
my best friend is engaged. Yes, I am thankful for  this! Because I have never met a girl who is such a good friend and who is amazingly beautiful both on the outside and inside. Her strong roots in faith, family, and friends makes her just an amazing person.  And while we can go weeks without talking, when we do it is like we just had lunch a week ago. in fact, when she called me at 8:00 on a Friday night, I just knew the news she was about to tell me and when she said, “Barbie.” my next words were, “Stop.” – I am so lucky to have her in my life and so grateful that a little place called Mugshots brought us together years ago!! I cannot believe it has taken this long for her to be off the market, but Greg is an great guy and he is so lucky to have Heather in his life forever.  Now, I cannot wait to help her plan her wedding and help her celebrate her big day,

 {five}
my health. this year has been quite the whirlwind for health “problems”.  I had a healthy and easy pregnancy and for that, I am forever grateful. And with the exception that McKenna just didn’t want to “come” I had a fairly easy labor. But then I found out that my C-Section was infected with MRSA and it took about 7 weeks post partum to determine that so I am grateful that it never spread and that it didn’t hospitalize me.  And then I got the melanoma diagnosis and while we went in hoping for the best, we also had to brace ourselves for the worst. Again, luckily it was caught early and it hadn’t spread and now I just get to be extra diligent about my skin care and sun exposure. And while I beat myself up for not being able to work out and lose the baby weight and still being in maternity clothes and unable to wear my rings 4 months post baby I have to remember all that I have been through and that I have been medically not allowed to really work out.  But, I get to be thankful for my health and that I was given a today. 

2014 has been a pretty spectacular year. Not gonna lie. Full of life changes and huge adjustments. But, I wouldn’t trade a minute of it.

<< Insert Title Here >>

I HAVE NO ENERGY TO THINK OF A WITTY FUN TITLE. NOR AM I CREATIVE. PLUS I AM EXHAUSTED AND ITCHING FOR THE WEEKEND.

McKenna’s 1st Family 5k:
We “ran” the Big Pumpkin 5k in Roswell.  I think this was my 3rd  time running this race and I have always liked it.  Good mix of hills and flat road. The kids who were part of a running “team” were ADORABLE and while I want M to stay little forever, it made me so excited for her Elementary School days.  Moving on: we rocked the race if I do say so myself. We finished in 40:59 … which isn’t my best 5k time … but it is really good for the fact that I really have not been running anything hilly with McKenna in the stroller or really running at all. Little Miss slept the whole time and Kyle (who finished in 28:52 & beat his last 5K time) cam back to meet us.  I still think that we would have finished faster had the finish line not been littered with speed bumps!!!

Health Update:
monday was my eye appointment. and honestly, I was terrified for bad news. my eyes have always been wonky, feeling heavy and randomly blurry. I was terrified I would get bad news since I honestly have no idea how long I had melanoma on back.  However, after to say “my doctor found melanoma” out loud to a medical professional {which makes it feel so much more real} and crying a bit I got a comprehensive eye exam and my eyes were given a clean bill of health.

tuesday was the appointment with the skin cancer specialist. terrified doesn’t even begin to cover how scared I was. full disclosure: over the weekend I had my 1st emotional breakdown since I was told that I had melanoma. I was scared for Kyle and McKenna and if they would be ok if anything happened to me and I didn’t want to miss anything – I had an ugly cry to kyle. And I cried at the doctor Tuesday. Truthfully, I was scared that my laziness in going to the dermatologist was legit going to kill me. WELL. We got some good news. Yes, I have (had?) melanoma, but it looks like it was caught early. So it was stage 1A and .33 millimeters deep. Which means the probability of it spreading to my organs etc is like 5%.  And they cut that bad boy out and I will have like a 6” scar on my back and now we wait to see to make sure the margins are clear and it hadn’t spread to any other parts of the skin.  I have one more mole that is going to be removed in December, and I will find out hopefully sooner than later that they 100% cleared all the melanoma out this week.

I do still have my physical on Monday to ensure that nothing has spread and to just get an overall assessment of my health.  Fingers crossed that all goes well.

I would be lying if I wasn’t bummed about my working out instructions or better yet, my instructions to not work out for what seems like an eternity. AN ETERNITY I TELL YOU. Because of where my excision took place this week I cannot work out (other than walking and running and bis and tris) for 2 months. That means no Blast900 and no Flywheel and no Pure Barre till December.  Well… let me add salt to the wound. I have the 2nd mole being removed in December and it is in the same general area on my back, which means I cannot work out for 2 months after that. Giving me a total of 4 months of non of my amazing studio workouts.  I.AM.NOT.HAPPY.

I was just starting to fall back in love with Pure Barre and got the 3 months unlimited Baby Bounce Back & luckily the owner in Dunwoody is amazing & she is allowing me to hold off on starting the 3 months till February. Flywheel opened their 3rd location practically in my backyard and I was booked for 2 rides this weekend – had to cancel – and I cannot start my #dawnpatrol 5:30 AM rides with them until 2015.  People. I was counting.down.the.days. till they opened and now I have to wait.  And… Blast well you know the drill.  And they are being superb also because my package expires before when I can use all the classes.  Well, they are going to credit me my classes once I am back in action.  I know in the grand scheme of things I shouldn’t be so worried and worked up over my studios being out of my life for 4 months, but I need those extra hard workouts sometimes and I still have like 20 pounds to lose post McKenna.

In Other News:

Stay tuned for Halloween costume pictures and how the Santa visit goes this weekend!!

Wear Sunscreen, Yo.

LIFE.
IT IS JUST THAT. LIFE.

So. Where to begin. Kyle’s sister and boyfriend came into town last weekend. It was fun. Low key and fun. I was glad that McKenna got to meet her Auntie Katie and “Uncle” Joel. And people. SHE WAS SO GOOD. This little baby of ours. Pure Joy.

McKenna is thriving in daycare. She is reaching for toys. and is like a few weeks away from sitting up on her own. and she is just so big now. I adore her and cannot wait to snuggle with her all weekend!

We have our 1st family 5k tomorrow and I am excited to bundle M up and get back to running and racing. I LOVE this 5k and I hope McKenna wins her age group. =D

And McKenna goes to see Santa on November 1. Which I am so excited about. 1st Santa at Phipps experience. We are so excited to start our traditions.  And. Santa at Phipps is one of those traditions.

AND.
IF I CAN BUG YOU?
CAN I REQUEST SOME PRAYERS?
PLEASE?

Last Friday I went to the dermatologist at the urging of Kyle and I am grateful he asked me to go. He thought some moles were odd. Nope. They were fine. But there were others that were odd. 3 biopsies later, I found out 1 was abnormal, but they think they removed it all {which I hope they did because hi, yeah, it still hurts 1 week later} and 2 came back not good. Melanoma not good. 1 worse than the other.

When you Google melanoma it pretty much tells you that is it dangerous and you will die. And you don’t even have to open a web site to see that – it is just there. BOOM. Thanks Goog for the high five of confidence. ‘Preciate It.  Then you tell people you have melanoma and they act like it ain’t no thing – that it can be removed and  you will be fine.  And then Kyle asks, “B, do you have Cancer” and I have NO IDEA how to answer that question because I don’t know. I guess? Maybe? Yes, but it isn’t a big deal? And then I feel like Cancer & “not a big deal” don’t belong in the same sentence. I don’t know what I have or anything about it. I didn’t think to ask questions. Honestly, I didn’t even know what she was saying until I googled the word “melanoma”. I don’t even know what questions to ask on Tuesday.

I just got a phone call telling me to go get an eye exam to make sure there is nothing wrong with my eyes {begin panic – is that why my vision has been blurry and wonky?!} since it can spread to the eyes. And to get a physical to make sure nothing has spread any where else. And  that the skin cancer surgeon will call me to get me in ASAP for surgery/removal.  And that I have to go to the dermatologist every 3 months for 1 year and then every 6 months for 5 years.  I mean – how can  you not worry when those are your marching orders?!  And then I now panic about any knife to skin since I had freaking MRSA after my C-Section. Y’all. I can’t.

So, Monday I have my eye appointment.  then Tuesday I have my mole removal surgery and then my physical is the following Monday. And I am being immature and petty and worrying about the wrong things, Like I should be worrying about the outcomes and if it spread, but my shallow, vain concerns surrounds me potentially not being able to work out post surgery. My documents say, “no working out for 2 months” because of where the mole is … and that just makes me RAWR.  I am loving my Pure Barre routine and my spin studio just opened in Alpharetta. I am finally getting OK with how I look post pregnancy and I can’t {correction, don’t want to} take 2 months off.

But. Deep Breath. Any prayers you want to lift up or good thoughts you want to give me or whatever you do, I won’t turn them away. And. I will keep you posted on how everything goes.

Until then. Have a rocking weekenddddddd! =D

Oh and Roll Tide, Beat Tennessee!